you better pop lock and drop that attitude
holding in a fart all day and finally getting home
why are most villains associated with dark stuff why can’t we have a villain who likes pink lacy pillows and rainbows and ponies
Because it’s terrifying as fuck
Willow hasn’t quite mastered the concept of a cat door yet.
she looks so lost
It has been three days. The servants have rebelled and refuse me refuge in my castle. They point and laugh and take pictures while I have been reduced to grovelling to be let in. I fear this may be my last entry.
*gasp* Friend is lonely?
on my way friend… woah wait…yes
I dance to maek you happy
did friend like dance?
I shall battle the sadness!
friend isso pretty, she shouldnt feel sad or lonely
lots of people love friend! shes funny
I give huggles to friend
when friend is happy, we are happy
remember to smile okay? Smile as you read this!
you are not alone friend. I am here. Be happy.
I’ll just pretend this is for me
i love it when TV shows make references to other TV shows
now we just need a show that references Supernatural
You mean like
[sleep-over voice] are you awake
[sleep-over reply voice] yeah
[regrettable sleepover invitee voice] you guys SHH
[confused sleep-over voice] what is the meaning of life
[annoyed sleep-over voice] dude shut up
[sleep-over host voice] you guys be quiet my moms gonna hear us
[unknown voice] you kids wanna buy some drugs
This tea is awful. It’s fucking disgusting. Don’t believe that lazy shit idyllic pastoral landscape on the goddamn cardboard box. It’s a damn lie and if you drink this tea you’ll know the heart of minty darkness
Like OK I appreciate that it tries to prepare you for whats inside by a cute picture on the box. Fresh green mint leaves, and some candy cane sticks to get you in that shitty assfaced Christmas mood. Look it’s even tied with a repugnant little red bow. fuck this tea.
So if you open the box and immediately steep a cup prepare to get one of those cute lil candy canes up your FUCKING NOSE and in your FUCKING EYES because this shit doesn’t know personal space in the same way a demon from hell doesn’t know a loving God.
I hope you like drinking your throat lozenges because here’s a blistering stream an actual menthol golem would piss down your fucking throat while you gag on its candy-striped wiener.
So you lock this shit in a box for 3 months while you recover from the worst toothpaste-flavored blowjob of your life and maybe get yourself together again. You recover. You move on. Things are looking pretty up and you think back, well maybe that godforsaken tea didn’t really taste like a peppermint Siberia. So you make a cup like the foolish piece of shit you are
and you’re right, but so wrong about the character and nature of your mistake you might as well star in Greek tragedy. You pathetic bag of bollocks.
because in the months its been locked in a top-shelf tomb the life and vehement mint-based hatred for the physical world has withered and desiccated out of its soulless teabag husks.
Now what you have got in your fucking unfortunate mug is a hot steaming cup of fuck you that tastes like the inside of the birch tree on the fucking box, or maybe Santa’s tears mixed with mummy dust, or midwinter leaf litter a vaguely minty dog only rolled in once.
The aftertaste stinks of wax. Why wax? Because it wants to remind you that you’re the kid who ate birthday candles in first grade, that’s why. And every single other bad decision you now regret.
fuck this tea. fuck it, it tastes like a hollow mannequin of a tea, hot leaf swill unfit to fertilize even fake fucking flowers.Maybe you could tan leather in it. I don’t fucking know but get it away from me and the human race. Fucking shoot it at the moon where it belongs with all of the other celestial fucking seasonings. fuck
I never thought I’d reblog a tea review but here we are.
But……peppermint tea is delicious….
science side of tumblr? explain?
levitate egg sackiatoo
yeah okay thanks hp fandom
the burning candle uses up all the oxygen in the bottle, which creates and a vacuum, and the resulting suction makes the egg go nyooom.
Thank you science side